Full disclosure – I am a soon-to-be-trainee and will start training later in the year. I thought a blog might be a good way to document the journey.

Last weekend I was at a friend’s house and mentioned I plan to start training soon. I was then asked ‘What does a therapist do?’. Cue awkward silence (on my part completely). The question was asked with zero malice and caught me off guard. This person had never come across the concept of a therapist outside of the TV sitcom Frasier. I couldn’t recall exactly what happened in Frasier and whether Frasier was a therapist I wanted to be associated with so I stumbled around for words to say what a therapist does. The second question which followed ‘Why would someone go to see a therapist?’ also stumped me. Perhaps all these answers will come in time or perhaps they won’t…

I want to build a few stock replies to these questions so I got thinking (dangerous).

The internet (eek)

Search results of what a therapist does:

• Kidshealth speaks my language – “In therapy, people meet with a therapist to talk and learn ways to work out their problems. At the beginning, the therapist asks questions about your problems. They also ask about other things in your life, such as family, school, and health. They listen to what it’s like for you so they can understand you.” (I’ve left out the reference to the kids parents in this quote.)
• UKCP – “Our psychotherapists and psychotherapeutic counsellors are trained to help you express your thoughts and feelings and explore what comes up when you do. They listen and provide a non-judgmental space so you can feel heard and understood.”

My experience

On reflection, the reason I was stumped by my curious pal was because I was thinking about what my therapist does for me.

• My therapist provides me with an experience of a secure relationship. I know she will be there at X time on X day, every week, come rain or shine.
• Facilitates mentalisation’ – my therapist helps me to make sense of myself, my inner and external worlds, my feelings and experiences.
• Shows compassion which acts like a spotlight to harsh and critical words.
• Shows curiosity towards beliefs/thoughts patterns and helps unpick them.
• Supportive/encouraging of what I want to do.

Conclusion: it is very difficult to describe what a therapist does and will also depend on their approach and training. Mentalisation and a secure relationship are the two key aspects for me so I will have a go at explaining that in future. Wish me luck.